A Black Bird for Doomsday Harks

Swing For the Fences

“It pays to help others” Well if by that, I get to help bookworm Umi pick up some dead chick at a bar, then I guess the old sayin’s right. Not bad though, got to let off some steam against a frost giant. Damn slegde hammer packs a wallop. It felt good to put him on ice… eh heh heh heh. Anyhow we met up with another dead guy at the same bar named Gary. Seems we were just dealing with a dead crowd … snicker So Umi decides to follow up and a lead and along with the bouncer (who’s also dead), we head up to the city morgue. Man we were just hitting up all the livliest places in town… I’m not gonna laugh at that one ‘cause it’s true! Crowd of dead folk didn’t know they were supposed to be dead! Umi explained it was on account of the ring of salt, holdin’ out the souls of the dead or soe Ozzy shit like that. It was pretty wierd. Not really as wierd as baldy at the front desk blowin’ his own brains out, man what a mess. There’s only so much a guy can go through in one night before the wierdness starts gettin’ to ya. Doesn’t help the chick we picked up at the bar got cut in half and was still talking a mile a minute. It gets under your skin pretty quick. Luckily we broke the salt ring and the dead folk got to get their peace, even the bouncer from the club who choked on a sandwhich. All in all, not a bad night, felt my age on me as we headed back to the hotel so I chilled at the bar and listened to that second-rate cover band butcher all my favorite classics. Might’ve been the beer, but I was itchin’ for a fight. Worked out well, cause these beatnik punks stormed the lobby of the hotel as we were tryin’ to leave. That didn’t bode to well for them. Found out our little band has a few interesting tricks up their sleeves from helpin’ the big guys up stairs. Umi tried explainin what a ‘Coatle or some shit was but all I know is “J” sicked one of them chicken lizards on a poor mook and I felt sorry for him. A bunch of other shit happened but I’m a little buzzed now so I think I gear my thoughts towards better days.

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